What Even is "Girlfriend Buff"?

11 Jul, 2026

I told myself I’d never marry a gamer.

"Girlfriend buff" i.e. gamer talk for leveling up your performance because 'you got the girl and life is on the up and up'… I think. I may have botched that, you may urban dictionary at your own risk.

I’ll circle back but for right now, some background.

Video games is a community I’ve never touched foot in except for Fortnite mobile in middle school. I’ve always generalized video games as "weird" and "bad for your brain". A ridiculous way to spend your life inside.

When E and I first met, he had just built his current PC when he moved to the base we’re stationed at. He hadn’t played video games for 6 months while training in Texas. When we weren’t working or hanging out he was playing and catching up on all his games. What I assumed was very single activities, I’ve since learned it’s very much an investment single or dating— and very much so married.

Bottom line: I do NOT like video games, BUT they are now apart of my life and not going away. I’m okay with that.

E’s been an avid gamer since high school. He tells me that when I tell people he games, that the average person (or gamer) wouldn’t get how good he is. I don’t have stats to share nor would E be in favor of me flexing his ranks but take my word for it— he’s versed. And has ultimate girlfriend buff (wifey buff now if that’s a thing??) is this how people feel when I talk military terms?

Since living together for over a year now, video games is apart of the daily routine. Both of us have had to acclimate to each others strong feelings towards the game. Me, on one end of the spectrum— 10/10 do not get the appeal and E, “would die for this shit” in his words. Despite my indifference toward video games, I love E’s passion and conceptual approach to the art form that is 'first person shooter' play. The team building, tactical responsiveness, and stimulation is something I can appreciate (from afar… let’s not get too riled up).

Due to my lack of enthusiasm for video games, I’ve had to combat it with my love for E and how he recharges, decompresses, and just simply has a good time. Just like any other hobby; there’s trips involved, multiple day excursions, lingo outsiders don’t get… video games being so foreign to me, it’s been quite the discovery for me to embrace E’s hobby. Maybe it’s because I don’t have a time consuming one of my own or anything remotely close to his love of gaming.

There has been lots of bumps in the road and countless nights trying to self soothe to be able to say this now with contentment, but I’m a proud gamer wife! My pride is reinforced with my fair share of personal opinions of course, but overall I gotta pay respects to E for his undying love of video games. He manages playing well (all things considered) with being employed full time, in school, a newly married man, and a wonderful companion to a crafty-coffee loving gal who loves to go out!

I’ve gotten pretty good at following along with the games he plays and all the rules and updates. It’s A LOT to keep track of it's but always fun to be in the know. The screaming at the screen and bursts of excitement with his buddies on discord are pure entertainment.

Sometimes I watch him play on the couch. Well, more so loudly sigh until he takes a break lol. So, i'd be lying if said that I’m totally okay with how much he plays and I do wish he didn’t play at all… but as we continue to grow every day into our family of two, I love that we get to exemplify our commitment to each other by how we show up (or sometimes take a step back).

All to say, happily meshing your life with someone else’s will always be followed by making compromise and choices. Choosing to be flexible and assured in one another even in uncertainty, really is the whole point.